chlorophylliac | 22 || Text + Voice + Spam

22 || Text + Voice + Spam

[Private to Vesper; text]

I need to apologize for what I did to you in March.

I'm not asking for your forgiveness, and I don't expect it; I just want you to know that I'm sorry for what I did. I know it's long overdue. After what I was put through in Zero I was far too hasty in putting that week behind me.

[Friends Filter; voice]

[Ivy's definition of 'friend' for this purpose is '2+ civil conversations while not under mind control'.]

I doubt I'm the only person who needed a while to recover from the port; still, I'm sorry if I worried anyone. If it hasn't already been made obvious, I'd like to hear that you made it back safely.

[Open Spam - Greenhouse & Garden]

[Of course she ends up back out here eventually. The rain's tailed off; seasonality is muted here but nonetheless the light falling onto the deck is a little brighter, a little warmer, and it's brought a fresh flush of growth to the greenhouse and rows of planters just outside. Ivy's mostly busy with making sure that the (her) plants have the space and support they need: repotting seedlings, staking out climbers, and moving the more delicate plants outside now it's warm enough to sustain them.

She seems - calm, all things considered, moving fluidly and talking to the plants in indistinguishable murmurs.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I've had worse weekends, but even I need to sleep after four days. Yourself?

Spent running from children and paternal minotaurs. [Everything about his tone says 'don't ask.'] But well enough.

Sounds charming. [Everything about her tone says 'what the actual fuck was wrong with that place'.]

...I'm glad you made it back intact.

[He would love to know, except he really would not at all. Also his son's nemesis is a little girl and he just wants to shake his head for an eternity.]

So am I. How do you feel about company?

I'd like that. Where are you?

My room.

[And so is Ivy, tapping on the door not long afterwards. She's recently showered after working in the greenhouse, barefoot with her hair pulled back into a loose damp braid.]

[It opens with a wave, and he looks up from where he sits at his chess set with a little smile once he sees her.] You look lovely. [She looks put together and alive, and that pretty much counts for everything.

Thank you.

[She smiles serenely and shuts the door behind her, crossing the floor to sit opposite him and review the board.]

...It's been a while since I played.

[He's playing against himself, halfheartedly; white is obviously ahead.] It's easy enough to pick back up. I'd never played, until I met Charles. Take white. [It's a partially gracious offer, and partially made because she's already sitting on the right side.]

And they say chivalry is dead. [She lifts a piece and considers a moment before setting it down.] Did he just want a partner, or was there a deeper lesson there about patience?

I'm certain there was a funeral procession and everything. [He shrugs, eyes flicking between her and the board.] Perhaps. But my patience still wears thin as the game comes to a close.

I've never been one to think that any game won by playing your opponent to a standstill is worth the time. Not the most satisfying kind of victory, is it?

[It's not enough. If they've even got one piece left on the board - it's not enough. It never will be.]

The satisfaction comes in cutting off their options. [Which he demonstrates by moving a rook into place, cutting her off.] In taking away every possibility, until you control the board. [He looks up at her, a smile in the corner of his mouth.] I thought you'd enjoy that.

I used to.

[She frowns faintly and makes a move that she knows will mean a sacrifice in the interests of opening up the board again.]

Now I prefer card games. Reading your opponent, anticipating their movements...taking control and letting them think it's still theirs.

[He smiles, and doesn't take her lamb, starting another gambit instead.]

The same exists in chess. There innumerable options on a chess board, no way to card count - but you still anticipate. It's your choice to show your hand before or after they realize you've won.

True, as far as it goes. But I prefer the element of randomness. The fact that some players are going to be hobbled the moment the first hand is dealt. They have no choice but to mislead their opponents.

[She makes a move.]

A game where both players start on equal ground and can win by strategy alone has nothing to teach either of them.

I suppose there's no natural disadvantage in chess. [He can understand that at least, it's not like he's been on equal footing his whole life.] But take my word for it, it's very satisfying to escape from the hole you've backed yourself into.

[She lifts her eyebrows.]

Really, Erik, I don't think either of us need a board in front of us to know how satisfying that is.

[He smiles a little at that, glancing up at her.]

I don't think anyone needs a board for that. [He gestures vaguely at the pieces.] The stakes are lower, but it's still competitive. Maybe there are lessons about patience, here, but there are lessons about sacrifice, too.

[He gestures, and his queen rises between them, turning.] She's the most powerful piece on the board; half the time when you've lost her, you've lost the game. [Another gesture, and this time he takes his turn by moving his pawn to the end of her side.]

But every pawn is a potential queen. [A shrug.] Or knight, or bishop. You can take that which has no value, and make it invaluable.

[Chess has a metaphor for every stage of his life, okay.]

[She frowns and moves a bishop. Her mind's obviously drifted off the game.]

Some things have no value for a reason.

[Obviously. It makes him focus on her again.]

What reasons?

You're telling me you can't think of a single person who'd have done the world a favor by never existing?

Maybe. [There are obvious answers, but the most obvious are the people responsible for making him who he is, for making him strong, and as much as he loathes Shaw, he can recognize that. Especially now.

Of course, that gives them value, and he doesn't particularly enjoy that thought.]

Or maybe they only need to exist long enough to serve their purpose.

Maybe.

[She leans back, reviewing the board.]

Though I think I might have a broader perspective. I am only too aware of how many people consume without a thought and contribute nothing in return.

[Private]

[Private]

[Private]

[Private]

[Private]

[Private]

[Spam]

[Spam]

[Spam]

[Spam]

[Spam]

[Spam]

[Spam]

[Spam]

[Spam]

[Spam]

[Spam]

[Spam]

[Spam]

[Spam]

[Spam]

[Spam]

[Spam]

[Spam]

[Spam]